Loneliness Never Lasts
by Nadako-Mika
Summary: [[COMPLETE]] Bakura's always so distant and cold. Ryou wants to know why he's the way he is. He takes a little look into Bakura's past for the answers...


**Nadako:** This is a special one shot!   
**Bakura:** Why?   
**Nadako:**   
1) It's going to be about your past. Or what I made up anyways...   
2) This is written to a good friend of mine!   
**Yuugi:** Oooh! Who is it? Who is it?!   
**Nadako:** That bit of info... is going to be left till the end...

**Disclaimer:   
Bakura:** Nadako-mika does not own any thing related to Yu-Gi-Oh   
**Yuugi:** That includes the names, places, characters, objects, plots...OH and-   
**Nadako:** *twitch* WE GET THE POINT...*grumble*

  
  


**Loneliness Never Lasts**   
One Shot   
By: Nadako-Mika

  
  
  


Ryou watched as the sleeping form of his yami moved slightly. It was eight in the morning and he didn't have the heart ot wake him up. Bakura hadn't arrived home until two in the early morning, and had collapsed when climbing the stairs. Ryou had to haul him up to his room.

The white haired teen watched and wondered how such an evil being could look so peaceful during sleep. Bakura seemed so tranquil, his breathing was slow and even, and he didn't seem as tense as he is when awake. This was new to Ryou, for he had never seen Bakura as relaxed as this. His yami had always been so tense and cold. Always startled easily. And each time Ryou looked into his other half's eyes, he saw emptiness, as if something was missing.

'_Was Bakura always this cold and distant?_' A little voice echoed from the back of his mind. He took a long look at Bakura before turning to the window.

Spring had just started to set in. The birds had migrated back again and were chirping happily. The golden sun was just awakening and painted the sky with a warm glow. Meltwater dripped slowly from the snow which settled onto the bare branches of trees. The coming of spring signified the breaking of a harsh and cold winter.

'_I wonder if Bakura's heart will ever melt with the snow..._'

He wished for his yami to break through the icy barrier surrounding his heart. Ryou knew that deep down, somewhere not even Bakura knew existed, there was kindness. Just like there was darkness somewhere inside himself. No one could have been born cold hearted, just as no one could have been bored completely kind hearted.

'_I want to know what made Bakura so distant._'

Ryou reached for the Sennen Ring. He would search Bakura's soul room for the answers. Somewhere in there would be a place where his memories were stored, just like how there was a spot in Ryou's. The Ring gave a faint glow as Ryou felt himself being tugged harshly into the item.

The walls around him seemed to swirl with life. Ryou sighed peacefully as he materialized in his chamber. He loved the place. It reflected his every mood; an icy blue when he feels alone, black when angry, red when loved, and a dazzling yellow when he was in a happy mood. He felt confused at the moment which meant the colors around him swirled quickly and gracefully, not knowing what color to choose.

Ryou walked through a solid door and came upon a familiar corridor. Cobblestones were packed tightly, forming the floor. A stream of light shone in from one side, from an unknown source, illuminating the area in such a manner that it created an eerie atmosphere. Straight across from Ryou's room was a large stone door, cracked and weathered with age. The door lead right to Bakura's soul room.

The door opened slightly as soon as Ryou touched the stone. He was startled at the sudden movement. The stones grumbled as they were scrapped across the cobblestones. Ryou quickly but cautiously made his way inside.

The chamber was pitch black. There were no colors swirling about like in Ryou's room. The walls were just a solid depressing black. Ryou faintly saw the form of Bakura slouched in a corner. He was sleeping.

'_He must really be tired if he's sleeping in his mind as well..._'

A faint glow from the darkest corner of the room caught the boy's attention. The swirling disk of light was suspended in the air. Ryou drew closer to the light, knowing that this must be the spot where all memories were kept. He looked back to make sure Bakura was still asleep. He didn't want to be caught by his yami. When he was completely convinced that Bakura was fully asleep, he reached out for the spinning disk. As his fingertips came in contact with the swirling wad of light he felt the room around him spin. The dark walls mixing and colliding with the bright light. When the world around him finally fell into place, it was no longer dark and gloomy. Rather, it was bright and sunny.

Ryou sheilded his eyes from the intense sun. He found himself at the edge of a small town or village in the middle of a desert. It was scorchingly hot and the sweater he had on didn't help. He quickly took off the sweater, not wanting to be baked alive. He sat down on a near by rock and waited for something to happen. Upon hearing hooves beating on the scolding sand, he hid behind the village wall, watching as the scene played out in front of him...

---------*-*----------

"Father, Must we move?" a young boy at about the age of seven, with snowy white hair asked.

"Yes. It is necessary," A bold looking man said. He whipped the horses drawing the carriage, urging them to run faster.

"Why, father? We had just settled down in Maahmode[1]."

"I need a job, Kawaige[2]. Now do not ask me anymore questions. These horses are becoming lame and I need to drive them. HEYA!" The man used his leather whip to lash at the horses again, earning him a painful whine from the animals.

"Father, you're working them too hard!" The child, known as Kawaige, cried out.

"Quiet boy!" He was having trouble controlling the speeding horses. Just when the man thought he had everything under control, one of the animals collapsed bringing the other horse and the whole cart down with it. "Damned!" he cursed before grabbing the boy and jumping off the out of control cart. He watched as the rolling mass of animal and wood tumbled towards an alleyway. Kawaige's father turned to his son, his face raging with anger. "Look at what you have done! You better pray that the pottery was not damaged!"

Kawaige hung his head in shame. He had angered his father tonight, and he would surely pay. Clear salty tears fell from his innocent eyes.

------

Kawaige sat against the wall of his new home, scrawling away on papyrus. He loved to write. On nice days he would sit out all the day and write or draw anything that came to mind. The young boy loved to do anything that concerned ink on papyrus. His father objected to the habit, however. He kept telling Kawaige that it was a waste of time, and he should learn more improtant matters.

A group of children ran laughing down the deserted streets. They jogged down the road laughing and telling stories. One of the kids stopped, noticing something different.

"Hey, Look! There's a boy sitting there!" a sandy haired boy called out.

"I've never seen him before, do you think he's new?" the young girl asked.

"I don't know Apuru, but look at his hair! It's so light," another boy said.

"Hmph," was heard from the last child in the group. His hair was a dark brown, and his eyes were an icy blue, "He looks like an outsider. No one in this country has white hair."

"So? He looks friendly," the boy with blonde hair said.

"He only looks that way Jou. He may be from some foreign land. We can't trust him. My father, being the higher ranked priest, could lock that stranger away with one word!" the boy bragged.

"Why would your father lock a boy up, Setou? Can't we at least give him a chance?" the boy named Jou complained. There weren't many kids around the village, and he wanted to make new friends.

"I don't know Jouno..." the other boy said.

"What do you mean Honda?"

"Well... Yesterday I heard my mother talking with Apuru's mother," he started, "They said that this boy's father runs a black market, and you know those are forbidden in our land. I heard my mother say that his father had frightened him so much, that he's become mean and scary himself!"

Jou stared at his friend in disbelief. "You're making it up."

"Afraid not. Ask Apuru, she was there!" Honda pointed to the girl beside him.

"Yeah, I heard," Apuru said, nodding, "And I also heard that one night, that boy's father had kicked him out of the house and he had to live out in the desert for five rising suns! My mom said that he had to kill snakes and scorpians to eat inorder to survive."

Setou turned to Jou, "See! I told you he couldn't be trusted! He's not normal, look at his hair. Who else have you seen with white hair?"

Jou didn't reply or say a word. He started heading to the marketplace. "Let's go..."

The young boy the group was talking about sat quietly, gripping the brush he held in his hand tightly. Did those kids think he couldn't hear them? Silent tears trickled down his face and dropped onto the papyrus, staining it. Why did they always have to pick on him? Just because he looked different...

"Kawaige, you worthless boy! It's close to supper time, make yourself useful and make the meal!" came his father's angry voice.

Kawaige hastily wiped the salty droplets that formed in his eyes. "Y-Yes Father!" he replied while heading into his new home. He carefully rolled up the scroll of papyrus and put away the brush and ink.

Ryou watched sadly as the younger version of his Bakura run around in the small kitchen, trying to prepare a meal for his father. He watched as the young boy burned his tender skin many times over the roaring flames. '_Poor Bakura..._' Ryou thought as he continued watching the memories.

------

The past form of Bakura, Kawaige, sat outside scribbling on the scroll sprawled across his lap. This seemed to be his daily ritual. After he had finished making meals for his father, he would grab his equipment and head outside for some solitude. He found a quiet spot down at the marketplace, near the water well. There didn't seem to be many people out that day. Most of the market stands were closed.

As Kawaige drew on the parchment he brought with him, he felt something rub up against his arm. He looked to the side and found a pair of warm copper eyes staring at thim. It was a lovely black cat. He reached his hand out to pet the animal. It started purring peacefully as Kawaige stroked it's soft fur.

"Hey!" a voice shouted from across the street.

Both Kawaige and the cat look towards the source of the sound. Kawaige saw that it was the same boy from yesterday, the one with sandy blond hair. He watched as the boy quickly sprinted towards him. The boy took a short breath before taking Kawaige by the arm and dragging him away from the cat.

"You really shouldn't go petting cats like that," Jou said.

"Why not?"

"Only rich people have cats, and they don't like us commoners touching their precious pets. And that was the Pharaoh's cat back there! If one of the city gaurds or even my friend Setou, caught you, you would be thrown in the dungeons straight away!"

"Oh..." was all Kawaige could say, "M-My name is Kawaige...what's yours?" Why not try to make friends?

"My name is Jouno. Welcome to Aarkageh[3], Kawaige," Jou replied warmly.

"_Jouno! Where are you?_" a distant voice called.

Jou groaned slightly, "I have to go. Um.. maybe I'll see you again some other day."

"Uh... sure.." Kawaige replied. He knew he'd never see the boy again. He could tell by the tone of Jou's voice that he was really anxious to get away from him. Afterall, Jou's friends hated him. They thought he was a threat to their well being...

------

Another new moon had passed. Aarkageh didn't seem too bad to Kawaige, nothing really bad had happened to him yet. The day was unusually cold for the climate in Egypt. Chill winds blew through the open homes of many people. Many stayed inside, hoping for a little more warmth. They weren't used to the sudden chill in the air. Kawaige didn't mind the dropping temperature though. The cold winds didn't bother his exposed skin. He was outside again, sitting by the water well, writing. He hummed a oddly familiar tune to himself as he scribbled away.

A slight meowing and purring caught his ears. He looked to his side to find the cat he had seen a month ago. He moved away slightly. If the anyone caught him with the Pharaoh's cat... He didn't want to think about what would happen. Kawaige looked around cautiously. There wasn't anyone around. Maybe if he just...

The elegant feline purred happily as Kawaige stroked it's soft fur. He grinned to himself, something he never did anymore.

"Baeso! Where are you?" a small voice called out into the still air. A young boy, who looked to be Kawaige's age, ran from one of the dark alley ways. Tears brimmed his eyes. He smiled happily and brushed away the tears as he saw the cat sitting on Kawaige's lap. "Baeso!" he called out again.

The cat jumped from Kawaige's lap and towards the running boy. Kawaige frowned slightly. So the cat belonged to someone else... He watched sadly as the feline jumped into the boy's arms.

"I thought I had lost you, Baeso," the boy turned to look at Kawaige, "Thank you for holding onto him. He ran away about three Suns ago, I've been looking everywhere for him."

Kawaige only nodded in response.

"What is your name?"

"My name... is Kawaige."

"I'm very pleased to meet you Kawaige," the boy said cheerfully, "My name is Yami."

Realization dawned on the white haired boy. Yami was the Pharaoh's only son! Kawaige immediately fell down to his knees. "P-Prince Yami! I didn't recognize you! Please forgive me for being so rude." he stuttered.

The boy known as Yami frowned. He didn't like this type of attention. "Stand up Kawaige. You don't have to be so formal around me," he said.

"Prince Yami!" someone called out. Yami turned around and saw his father's advisor, Shimon, running towards him. "Prince Yami! You were not to leave the Palace gates."

"But I found Baeso," Yami argued back.

"Yes, that's great and all. But you must get back to the Palace before your father returns." Shimon said.

"Can I bring a friend?"

"What?!"

"Can I bring Kawaige to the palace? I get so lonely there. I have no real friends, Shimon."

The advisor looked at Kawaige. Checking for any possible threats. Kawaige bowed his head in respect. "Hm.. I guess it wouldn't hurt. I'll have to talk to your father about it later," Shimon answered, "But we must go now. The Pharaoh will become angry at your disappearance."

Yami only smiled happily and dragged Kawaige with him towards the palace gates. Kawaige felt the sadness on his heart lift, he finally had a friend.

------

"Good morning, Master Kawaige," one of the palace gaurds greeted.

Eleven year old Kawaige walked up the palace steps and awaited his friend Yami. He waited patiently as the Prince pushed open the large doors. He smiled happily as he was lead into the large building.

"What are we doing today?" Kawaige asked.

"I have studies today," Yami answered, "You can come along with me though. I'm sure Shimon won't mind."

Kawaige was lead through many corridors of the palace before he and Yami stopped at a particular door. As Kawaige stepped into the room, he frowned. There sitting in a chair was that boy, Setou.

"Kawaige, I'd like you to be Setou. He's here in training to become a high priest like his father." Yami explained while taking his seat next to Setou. He motioned for his friend to join him in the lesson. Kawaige hesitantly sat down.

The day went by slowly. The lectures given by Shimon were long and boring. Kawaige had fallen asleep a couple of times during the day, not that he minded. He needed the sleep. By the time Yami's lessons were finished, the moon had already rose and illuminated the starry sky. Yami lead a yawning Kawaige back to the palace gates.

"I'm sorry we couldn't do much today," Yami said sorrowfully.

"It's fine," Kawaige yawned loudly, "You have responsiblities, being the Pharaoh's son." He started to head out when he turned back and said, "Maybe I'll see you tomorrow."

Yami looked down at the gound. "Um..about that," he started, "I have to go on a trip with my father. It's part of my training. I don't know when I'll be back."

Kawaige frowned for the second time that day. "Then I'll see you when you come back?"

"Yes."

"Promise we'll stay friends?" Kawaige asked hopefully.

Yami smiled and nodded.

"I'll see you around then..." Kawaige said quietly before running out into the dark city.

------

The years passed by and Kawaige was still as lonely as ever. It had been four years since his best and only friend, Yami, had gone away. No other kids from the city would talk to him, thinking he was still dangerous. Only Jouno had talked to him, but only for a short period of time. Kawaige waited endlessly for Yami to return.

He sat in the house alone. His father wasn't home any longer. He had heard from his father's friends that he had died. His father had been executed as a theif and murderer. The news soon travelled throughout the city, the greatest theif had been caught and they were thankful. Kawaige wasn't though. He had no family left now.

One day a finely crafted carriage pulled into the city. "The Prince has returned!" the people shouted. Hearing this, Kawaige ran out onto the streets, hoping to see his friend. He pushed his way through the crowd of people, towards the palace gates. The finely drawn carriage stopped just before the gates and the palace gaurds rushed to aid the passenger. Yami stepped out.

Four years had made an impact on his appearance. His eyes were no longer large and innocent, now they were sharp and cold. He had grown a little, though not so much. His figure was no longer thin and weak, but lean and muscular. He had changed.

"Prince Yami!" Kawaige called out. He waved his arms furiously, trying to get the boy's attention.

Yami walked swiftly towards him. "Who are you?" he said rather coldly.

Kawaige was taken back. "Why...you don't remember me? I'm Kawaige."

"Kawa-ige?" Yami thought deeply, "I think I remember a..."

The other boy looked at his friend, hope shimmering in his eyes.

"Kawaige Ikussa?"

"Yes."

Yami growled, "I know you! You're the son of that man who murdered my father!"

Kawaige gasped. What? His father had killed the Pharaoh? That couldn't be. His father would never sink that low. "N-no... No! It can't be.."

"OH yes it is. I remember it clearly. Your Ra damned father came into our camp trying to steal the Pharaoh's sceptar. When my father caught him, he lashed out and killed the Pharaoh!" Yami's voice was lined with hatred. His ruby eyes flared out. "Gaurds! Take him away to the dungeons. He's probably as ruthless as his father was."

Kawaige only stared in shock at his former friend. He didn't fight back when the gaurds hauled him away. He only looked at his friend sadly. He was lead through many familiar halls of the palace. As the gaurds hauled him down a large stair case, he spotted Shimon. The aged man quickly ran to him.

"What is this?" Shimon asked, outraged.

"It was the Pharaoh's orders, sir. We are to have him locked up." one of the gaurds answered respectively.

The old man took one look into Kawaige's still shocked expression. "I'll take him there."

"Sir, I am not sure that's such a good-"

"Let me. I know this boy, he won't do any harm."

The gaurds gave in reluctantly. Shimon guided Kawaige the rest of the way down to the dark dungeons.

"What did you do?" Shimon asked in a gentle voice.

"N-nothing... Yami just told me that I had to be locked away because of what my father had done..."

"And what exactly did your father do?"

"He...He killed the Pharaoh..." Kawaige hung his head in shame.

Shimon stopped Kawaige and looked into his eyes. "Kawaige, you don't deserve this treatment. You are a good boy, I know it. I can do nothing for you at the moment. You will have to stay in the chambers until I have talked some sense into Pharaoh Yami. Am I understood?" he explained. But he didn't get a reply from the boy. Shimon sighed and opened the dungeon doors. "Just stay in there until I find a way to get you out, Kawaige." he said before locking the depressed boy in the room.

Kawaige sat down on the stone benches. Shimon was right, he didn't deserve this kind of treatment. He hadn't done anything wrong. He had tried to live a normal and happy life, but this was what he got. It was unfair.

'_Yami lied to me. He said he'd be friends with me no matter what..._' Kawaige thought. '_Why try to make friends? I was probably never meant to have any friends._' The boy's eyes darkened as he thought things over. '_I see what Father was right all along. If you wanted to live, you would need to live as a theif... My father had never steered me wrong. He had taught me right. The law is wrong. The law is the true criminal. We, theifs, are but innocent bystanders trying to live life._'

From a small hidden pocket, Kawaige took out a sharp metal wedge. He picked out a heavy stone from the ground and headed towards the barred window. He placed the wedge between the stones which held the bars, and slammed it with the rock. He loosened the concrete around the opening using this method. When all the bricks were loosened, he pulled on the bars. The whole opening came out, and left a gap large enough for him to fit through. He grinned malicously, something he had never done before, and crawled out into the darkness. Running swiftly and skillfully...like a theif in the night...

Ryou watched from the shadows of the dungeon. He frowned. '_So that's why Bakura's so cold. He's been hurt. Betrayed by his best friend._' Suddenly he was jerked back to reality.

---------*-*----------

Ryou opened his eyes to find an angry looking Bakura. His eyes were hard and empty and he wore a snarl on his face. But Ryou now knew the true face behind the mask.

"What...did you see?" Bakura growled.

"Everything..." Ryou said calmly.

"What?!"

"I saw you as a child."

The insane yami's eyes softened slightly. The innocent glint in his eyes from when he was a child replaced the dull angry ones. "What exactly did you see?" his voice was barely audible.

"Your past, how everything went wrong."

Bakura looked down. "I was alone..." he said to himself. Memories came flashing back to him. Memories that he wanted to seal away forever. But Ryou had broken the barrier by going into them. "No friends..nothing."

"That's not true..." Ryou said, "You had Yami."

"Yami?! That self-centered Pharaoh?! He locked me up, Ryou, and you saw it," Bakura lashed out. He immediately calmed down when he saw his hikari's frightened face. "I was never meant to have any friends, still not." he shook his head. He chuckled half-heartedly as crystal tears slid down his pale face.

"How can you say that?"

"Say what?"

"How can you say that you're not meant to have any friends?" Ryou asked.

"I never could make any friends as a child. And I still don't have a friend now... five millenia later.."

"That's not true yami," Ryou stated, "You do have a friend."

Bakura looked at his hikari. His eyes narrowed in disbelief. "Oh really?" he scoffed, "Who?"

"Me..." Ryou said simply.

Bakura just stared, an unfamiliar emotion pulsating through his mind. Was it hatred? Despise? Loneliness? No. It didn't feel like any of those. Was he feeling loved? Yes... Loved. For once in his unhappy life...he felt loved, needed by someone... Needed and loved by Ryou..

'_You'll never be alone again.....Kawaige._'

_**Owari/End**_

--------------------------------------

[1] **Maahmode-** (Ma - Moe - Day) I made it up... It was a city Kawaige/Bakura had previously lived in.   
[2] **Kawaige-** (don't know how to properly pronounce it...) Japanese for 'Charms of an Innocent Child'. I just decided it would suite Bakura...   
[3] **Aarkageh-** (Are - Kaw - Ja) Another made up word. It's the current city Kawaige/Bakura was in.

-------

**Nadako:** WHOO! FINISHED! Just in time too! ^^   
**Bakura:** This was long...   
**Nadako:** Yes... it was... Took me forever..=.= Would have finished it earlier...but...SCHOOL WORK! GAH! +_+   
**Bakura:** -_-; So that's my past huh?   
**Nadako:** No. Your past is unknown. I just made that up -^^-   
**Bakura:** *shakes head*   
**Yuugi:** So? Who are you writing this for?   
**Nadako:** Oh yes.. That! *clears throat*   
  
This Fanfic is dedicated to a good friend of mine, Nodoro Bru!. ^_^ I hope you like this Nodoro!


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